Female Warrior, a great writer for warriors of freedom, always notes, “Recapitulate! And when you are done with that, recapitulate some more.” Her blog on recapitulation, http://thetoltecpath.wordpress.com/2010/02/19/freedom-through-recapitulation/#more-760 , is an excellent introduction to why we recapitulate as warriors of freedom.
The Toltec practice is hinged on a several areas of discipline that we practice all the time. Recapitulation, practicing silence, detachment, dreaming and stalking are a few of the baseline techniques for the path. Recapitulation is at the core of that path. Even recently while walking through a park, my talking made my other half state, you probably need to recapitulate that now that you have talked it to death. So it is not just the talking cure that leads to recapitulation, we must activate the energy wasted on our repetitive stories to return to the truth of our being.
Starting to recapitulate using some of Carlos Casteneda’s techniques was and is a fantastic method to begin. What occurred, at least in my case, was a dynamic where the patterns of behaviors and energy around the false matrix of my being (what we call the foreign installation from the predator) set itself up in direct counter distinction to my true self. Literally I saw that I have two beings within me. It is the true self that can be fluid with energy and move our assemblage points with infinite awareness. When we start to recapitulate, energy is totally free in our system. It is what happens to that energy once it is available that counts. The foreign installation reacts by creating fear and feeding free energy back into default patterns. It is these default patterns of behavior and energetic waste that leads to an even deeper possibility for recapitulation… “recapitulate some more!”
Past memories are the best start, making lists of people we knew, sexual inventories and the like as C Casteneda said, but how do we get that energy to not refill our lives with additional stories and patterns? We go after our default patterns in the present. We learn to recapitulate in the present as things are happening. We need techniques and detachment and perspective about these patterns.
I have found that the Enneagram is a great tool for getting at these patterns. (See Helen Palmer as a great introduction book) The enneagram is an ancient tool for self-awareness. Unlike many of the personality matrixes out there like Myers/Briggs, the Enneagram is not a fixed system. In other words the tool does not just say we are one type and will be so for our entire lives. This is anathema to the warrior of freedom. This would be forcing us to submit to the fate of the ordinary person and die the same person we were when we were born.
The Enneagram relates our default personality structure to certain memory engrams which we inherit from our world, parents, culture and the story of our lives as we become more aware. It notes that each default is founded on engrams which imbed within our minds (the false mind) in reaction to the world founded on the existential moment we became aware of our contract with death. Or when we discovered that we will die. Most of us, if we work at it, can recall that moment. And typical of that moment, our energy feels fear of not-being (existential fear – unresolved fear of the abstract) and we proceed to wall ourselves off from this first truth of awareness and create patterns to distract us from that truth. If we can face that truth, we can face the first battle of the warrior, fear, and is concurrent result making death an advisor. And that can lead to greater clarity about the other battles of being a warrior, clarity, power and seeing.
The Enneagram states that there are 9 fundamental emotional reactions to that initial state of realizing our deaths and from that the internal dialogue starts running amuck in our lives so we can’t see beyond our own selfish self-preservation of the pattern. This is one possible list of the nine defaults:
- Resentment/Anger – The Reformer
- Flattery/Pride – The Martyr
- Vanity/Deceit – The Chameleon
- Longing/Envy – The Artist
- Stinginess/Avarice – The Spy
- Doubt/Fear – The Bully/Victim
- Planning/Gluttony – The Escapist
- Vengeance/Lust – The Boss
- Indolence/Sloth – The Pacifist
This is not a perfect nor fixed list of words and associated energies to them, this is a bare bones introduction. It is a starting point to recognizing the patterns which our internal dialogue assaults us with feelings, thoughts and ideas about ourselves. The Enneagram works as a tool to help us un-write our obsession with our default traits and gives the warrior a method of battling the most important battle, self-importance.
The warrior of freedom does not accept any agreements made without our conscious choice and these patterns are agreements we made when we were unsuspecting and willing victims of the human condition. Almost everyone made this agreement to a repetitive pattern in very early childhood. In fact it is the first really unconscious reactions to a real conscious memory. There are typical stories or patterns that occur to support each type to come into being. This is the predator at its finest. It is the point when the foreign mind is injected, downloaded, and programed into our assemblage points. We become fixed and stable points of perception through which we filter all of our perceptions of the world.
We need to be careful as warriors not to use this sword of awareness to cut to shreds another person for their default modes. That is their battle, not our own. To cut away another’s defaults is part of the judgement and fear associated with the predator’s game to keep us docile and distracted. Rather it is critical to use the tool to see our own patterns. One is not just a 4. That may be the dominant default mode deeply connected to our first reaction to fear. One is actually all nine types in varying rates and influences. Depending on the situation we can fall prey to all the negative defaults. But it is in discovering the ground of our own being which lies beneath these negatives that we can begin to empower with recapitulation the real source of our being, infinity as our guide and freedom as our direction.
Recommending this tool means commitment to a process of self-study and further recapitulation. When my teacher first taught me the Enneagram he perceived that my default was as a 3 type. But with careful self-analysis, it became obvious that it was actually a 4 with strong external characteristics of a 3. So the false mind has wings which spread around the system and attempts to use all of these defaults to its advantage.
There is also a process of unraveling the stories and through recapitulating come to know the best parts of each of these types. So a 4 or 7 or a 9 all have advantages as well. The tool helps the person who recapitulates to find silence in the center of their being so as to access all of these advantageous skills to better free the spirit to fly. My teacher said, “we first walk through hell and see the faults, then we wander through consolation of purgatory and eliminate these to find our heaven where we can finally learn to fly free of the system itself on wings of an eagle.” He was a Jesuit priest of course. Though not the Eagle of the Toltec way, it is interesting to note that the goal of the Enneagram is to fly free and be our own energetic matrix of infinite possibilities not the trap of the initial stage of constant self-preservation as a result of fear.
Again, initial recapitulation frees enough energy so we can do the deeper work. At every step we start to be aware as warriors just how prevalent the unconscious predatory nature of the foreign mind is in all our fellow travelers on this planet. We cannot save anyone from their own defaults, but we can see more clearly why we are who we are and free our energy to do something better with the time we have on this beautiful planet. So recapitulate, and when you are finished, recapitulate some more!